Struggle Equals Strength

I am too positive to be doubtful, too optimistic to be fearful, and too determined to be defeated. I think that is the perfect quote to sum up life at this moment. Isn't it weird but awesome how God guides your life in His own way and in His own time? Every part of life serves a purpose; none of it is pointless. This fact is something that I have come to know very well. I have lived in doubt before, when I was feeling down and overwhelmed with my struggle; I think that was simply because I was no where near the path God had planned for my life. I did what I wanted to do. I can remember going through times when the only thought on my mind was "What is going on?", because nothing seemed to go right. The most wonderful part about surrendering and finally giving in to God's plans is that it makes all the "dots" connect. I have had the weirdest realization that without my struggle, I would not be where I am today. My past experiences are somehow vital to the completion of my purpose for being; it is a comfort because it lets me know I may have not always followed God like I should, but He never stopped following me. 

I will be attending my first West Virginia Statewide Independent Living Council (SILC) meeting tomorrow. Looking back, my story started six years earlier and I will be so excited to share it. I had such a rough time dealing with the WV Division of Rehabilitation Services, and in the morning I'll get my chance to go before some of those people and give an opinion on things that need changing. I am thankful for my struggle because it gave me the knowledge I need to truly make a difference for others who have disabilities and are trying to better their lives by getting an education or by trying to become independent. I don't know where life is headed for me, but I am looking forward to the ride. I plan on working to get as involved with SILC as possible. I want to use my life in order to make someone else's better. I want to travel and advocate for others. I want kids to be proud and confident in who they are. I don't want anyone going through what I have gone through. In a personal manner of speaking, I hope my days continue getting brighter; May has been such an awesome month with so much success and promise and the way I see it, the sky is truly the limit; everything that I'm on this Earth for is just beginning to unfold. 

3 Ways A Disability Brightens Life

Disabilities often hold a presence amongst the world that is associated with sentiments of pity or negativity. Society conditions people to think that because we may do every day tasks quite the same as others, we are somehow “damaged” or incapable of leading a normal, fruitful life. I’d like to think that living life a bit differently has made me more aware of the world that surrounds me. I know there are people out there like me who feel “stuck”, and I feel that my purpose on this planet is to help people and get them away from the wrongly imposed assumption that they can’t do anything because of their disability; that they can’t achieve their dreams. Sure, a disability is not ideal and it most certainly does come with negative setbacks. However, I would like to bring attention to three major ways I feel that having a disability has positively influenced my life. 

Number One: Instills Determination—First of all, I would say that dealing with cerebral palsy has instilled a lot of determination into my daily life. A lot of physical and emotional pain is sometimes present with a disability, and I have had to gradually learn to push through and persevere in order to make life a positive experience. I don’t ever give up, and that’s one thing I like to tell people: Don’t ever give up. Pursue everything you can dream of, because life is full of opportunity, and opportunity doesn’t discriminate. You are not your disability. Drive and determination are the key to success. The way I define success is simply trying, and the attitude with which you try will carry you such a long way. 

    Number Two: Gives You A Tougher Skin: I feel that having to cope with my disability has slowly given me a tougher skin. People who face challenges such as these go through more than most. I am a very sensitive person in some respects and I feel things such as rejection much more strongly than others because I dealt with a lot of that growing up. I have become tougher through the years, and I have developed a deeper compassion for those around me. My passion is helping others to grab onto their talents and become fulfilled individuals. I have not yet arrived to my full potential, but I’m going to keep working to get myself there. 

Number Three: Helps You to Appreciate Life—Life with a disability has taught me to appreciate simplicity and to not sweat the small stuff. Cerebral palsy has led me to battles with depression in the past, because I  have tried to be something I wasn’t; I was once focused on being a people pleaser; living that way can destroy your life. The positive aspect of going through that trial was that I learned what kind of person I could be. I realized that I hold the power to decide what direction life takes me. We all have that power within us. We can choose to make life more complicated than it has to be, or we can choose to live simply. We as people can let life and our disabilities define us, or we can define ourselves. Which will you choose? The choice is yours to make. 

I Am...Undefeated!!!

I’m back! I feel as if I’ve been away from the blog for the longest time when in reality it has only been one week. Pharyngitis was no fun at all! My week of down time was still buzzing with excitement. I can now say that I am an official published writer; just a small personal piece I wrote, but nonetheless a huge accomplishment! Two weeks ago, I submitted a “teenage letter” that I had written to myself to an online magazine called “The Mighty”; they are centered around empowering those who face illnesses and disabilities. I waited anxiously for several days before I received the “yes, we want to publish you” email. I was so excited; I had found this website on Facebook and had decided to write for them just to see if I could get published or not; I was NOT expecting them to accept my piece at all, especially on the first try, but I did it! I write because I love it; I have such a  passion for writing and I feel it in my bones every day. I’m always thinking of what I can write about next. My next goal is to tackle fiction, and perhaps some poetry. The sky is the limit! The feeling of satisfaction I get from expressing myself in that sort of way is truly incredible. I found a quote by Maya Angelou that I wanted to base this week’s post off of that speaks of facing adversity but never being defeated. Adversity seems to be the theme of my life.

    My journey has been laced with some of the rockiest roads and blessed with some of the smallest, most unimaginable victories. I am a true fighter; or at least I’d like to think of myself as one. I have always tried to rise above every life instance and I continuously remind myself that I am never the same as the day before; I’m constantly learning and growing. No matter what, I will never let myself be defeated. Everyone is “different” in some way and each person handles it in their own unique way and I have been guilty of letting life get the best of me and I haven’t made some of the smartest decisions. I think a lot of people will agree with me as I write this: if you allow yourself to sulk inside your differences, it will break your spirit. You will be crushed and without confidence you won’t be yourself and you won’t find your passion. I spent many years clueless and lonely, but one thing I never have been is defeated. I always get back on the metaphorical horse of life, because that’s what you’re supposed to do. In my darkest days, I found a great outlet of self expression. I’m a writer. I’ve always told stories, the only difference is I’ve not always written them as I do now. I love making people smile with my words. My friends and family will tell you I talk a lot once you get to know me. I’m proud of that and I own it. Take it or leave it. I feel that so often we let circumstances define us, and perhaps sometimes we as people don’t give ourselves enough credit. We let others tell us who we are. No one knows you best but you yourself. We’re all human. We all make mistakes. I have struggled with my past in many ways, but I am proud to say I am doing well and have tried to make the best of my life with what I have. I’m finally past all of the years of bullying and years of feeling unwanted and unloved. Some have knocked me down, but I always got right back up. I am undefeated. God has been so good to me and my family; I can’t thank Him enough. I am thankful that He blessed me with such strong willpower and an undying determination. I am undefeated. I have accomplished so much and my publication is just the beginning. I am undefeated. For those who bullied me, told me I wouldn’t amount to anything, to those who think they know me, for those who said I wasn’t pretty enough or smart enough…I’ve got something to say: I’m undefeated and you haven’t seen the last of me; the best is simply yet to come.

                             “We may encounter many defeats, but we must not be defeated”

                                                                       -Maya Angelou