Common Myths About Cerebral Palsy

March 25th is known as Cerebral Palsy Awareness Day; it is a day that hits close to home for me because this is something that has affected my personal life and is an aspect of myself that I have slowly learned to cherish. On this day, I am always reminded of how far life has taken me and how many struggles God has carried me through; it helps me to remain hopeful for the future.  Generally speaking, I feel society does not think highly enough of those with disabilities. Today, I would like to focus my attention on continuing to spread cerebral palsy awareness by dispelling five common myths about those who live with cerebral palsy. I hope to spread awareness about other issues in the future. A disability has the power to truly enrich someone’s life in a special way, and I hope this post informs others and helps someone to embrace life with fierceness, strength, and courage.

1) You Will Not Be Accepted into Society: A disability most definitely sets one apart from the rest of the world; however, you have the power to create your own standard of “normal”. The key to true success and happiness is accepting “the new normal” and taking the initiative to find out for yourself just who you are and learning to live life by that self definition. The internal struggle of feeling the need to be accepted by others seems to be prevalent in all disabilities; personally, it has been one of my greatest battles throughout life. I will tell you that it takes a very long time to establish that “new normal”. I was not always someone who took life by the reins; I spent years trying to be someone else. The biggest triumph I have ever enjoyed is getting to realize what all of my talents are and using them to set and accomplish positive goals; in other words, the trick to dispelling this myth is simply working to establish a place for yourself in the world, instead of trying to “fit in” to a rather dull society. The question is: Who do you want to be?

2) Your Future is Limited: The future of your existence is truly what you make of it. I believe that limitations should only pertain to your disability, and should NOT be affiliated with the amount of positivity that you possess throughout daily life; for instance, I haven’t learned to drive a car, but I still wake up every day healthy, functional, and completely independent in other areas of my life; a lot of people with disabilities have themselves convinced that because they have been labeled “different”, they cannot be just as typical as anyone else; it all depends on the type and severity of the problem at hand of course, but God has a specific plan for everyone. I feel that by shying away from so many unnecessarily self-imposed limitations, we can say goodbye to this assumption and replace it with “Don’t judge a book by its cover”; that kind of thinking will not only help one to accomplish what God has them here for, but will also show the world that they are capable of so much.

3) Cerebral Palsy is Curable: Unfortunately like most disabilities, cerebral palsy is not curable, and the wear and tear that is sustained by the body as you age makes your muscles more prone to spasms; the aches and pains in the joints also become more of a nuisance over time. However, the good news in all of this is that the disability itself will not worsen. I suffer from horrible muscle spasms in the bottoms of my feet at the most inopportune times, which can make it very difficult to walk; I try to find humor in pain as these always hit when I am carrying something. I have spilled countless cups of coffee either on myself or the floor; struggle gives the coffee a better flavor in my opinion. Nothing worthwhile ever comes easy! I am also known as the family klutz; I am the only woman I know who possesses the distinct talent of tripping over their own feet. I just get back up and keep going like it’s no big deal; you can’t sweat the small stuff.

4)Cerebral Palsy is Contagious: I have good news! No, cerebral palsy is not in any way contagious. I am giving a bit of a cliché answer when I say this, but the only thing that is contagious is the attitude in which you carry yourself . Life is best lived with a big smile and plenty of faith in God; having a lot of faith has been a big struggle for me in the past, but I have had to let God be in control of my story. He knows me better than I know myself. Chase your dreams, and not people. Let your light shine!

5)Cerebral Palsy Causes Retardation: Cerebral palsy is caused by one of two things: problems during pregnancy, or lack of oxygen during delivery; there are several types of cerebral palsy, with the most common being spastic CP. I have a mild form of spastic diplegia, which caused issues that are solely physical; both of my legs were affected. A very small percentage of those with cerebral palsy suffer from mental retardation. I am proud to say that even though I was born two months premature and only weighed two pounds and ten ounces at birth, I’ve gone on to earn a college degree and I’ve overcome more than my fair share of odds. I am excited for the future and I try to look for the positives in a situation whenever the opportunity arises. I am truly blessed, and I hope I’m one of those that helps to put to rest this very wrong misconception; however, I’m not the only one beating odds. In general, a lot of people with disabilities are high functioning and successful people; it is a shame that so many don’t acknowledge the accomplishments of those who face challenges. A change is most needed in society; I hope this post encourages that. You have got to start somewhere!
 

Cleaning Your House: The Three R's of Rejuvenation

March 20th marked the first official day of Spring, which means that the days of warmer weather and bright sunshine will soon be replacing the cold and sometimes snowy afternoons. After fighting a seemingly endless battle with writer’s block this past weekend, I enlisted my mother’s help in the search of material for this week’s post and she inspired me to come up with the perfect idea. The title I chose for this week  is “Cleaning Your House: The Three R’s of Rejuvenation”. The term “house” is used in a metaphorical sense in order to better describe the very thing that makes us all unique: life and how the mind responds; along with the change in the season, you must also learn to cleanse yourself and to rejuvenate your life for the better. How do you do that? The answer is simple: you reclaim your life, you refocus your energy, and you work as much as you can to recreate yourself into something that is both unique and beautiful; I would like to elaborate further on that thought by taking a moment to show an example of how I have learned to do those very things; it is not an easy task, but I truly hope this post motivates others and helps them to make their life what they want it to be.

Reclaim Your Life:  I want to start this point off by saying that no matter what kind of life you live, there is always a chance for you to reclaim your happiness and to redeem your future. The biggest mistake a person could ever make is letting someone else define their self worth; we as humans are never destined to be the same person we were yesterday; with every day comes the possibility of growth. We all have the power to choose between living in the past or living for today. Will you choose to regret your life or reclaim your life? Don’t let anyone tear you down; hold your head high and keep moving forward; life lessons are sometimes our greatest teachers.

Refocus Your Energy:  Making the decision to reclaim your life is the easy part of the rejuvenation process, but refocusing your energy is one of the hardest tasks to tackle. The main problem with refocusing energy is that humans tend to internalize so much of what is heard around them. People are like delicate flowers that need love and care to blossom; stepping on their soul only destroys everything about them, including how they view themselves and how they reflect themselves to the world. Don’t ever let yourself be tied to someone who doesn’t value you. Don’t let what others have said determine who you become; it is easier said than done, but try to take control by showing yourself and the world that you can become a person who has a sort of fierceness in her step. Once you reclaim your life and refocus on what’s most important, you can then begin the process of recreating your life and building upon your future.

Recreating Your World: While writing this post, I have to say that this was my most favorite of the three “R’s”. I have gone through a lot and I just want to say that I know what it feels like to be in a downward spiral and how hard it can be to rebuild your world from the ashes of life. The best advice I could give on how to “recreate” yourself is to take your past and work your hardest to make it into something positive that you can be proud of. I would say that while my journey has been full of heartache, my onsets of depression were self inflicted. I grew up going through life with a practical plan, but I never had the courage to follow any of my dreams; I don’t even think I knew what they were. I have always had a lot of creative energy, but I never knew how to truly own that talent; I was focused on the wrong areas of life. After trying so hard to fit in with others and nearly losing my life, I realized that I could never be like anyone else. I’m Molly. I’m unusual, creative, and I love to make my friends laugh; it took the destruction of who I thought I was supposed to be, to get through to the most exciting and interesting part of my existence yet. You have to get to the point where you become a risk taker; strive to make your life the most adventurous life ever lived. I hope to be a blogger, mentor, fiction writer…I want to do it all! I think there is something about going through the worst part of your life that makes the rest of the journey so much sweeter; I know I appreciate the little things more than I used to. The moral of this post is that even if your life looks bleak right now, your rainbow might be around the corner from where you are standing. Be a warrior. Don’t ever quit. The power to clean your “house” can only be found within you.

 -"The flower that blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all"- "Mulan"

How I Deal With Anger

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Anger is an emotion that we as humans all experience at some point of our lives; it is one that has the potential to be channeled in a positive manner, but so often destroys the mind because it is not dealt with properly. The two questions I am answering in this week’s blog post are: “What makes me angry?” and “How do I deal with it?” I feel that I’m not a perfect example, as I’m still progressing in my battle with emotions, but I do hope to provide some helpful and hopeful insight to young adults who also struggle by sharing what I’ve learned so far. 

 I have narrowed my list of what angers me into four broad areas and the first of those is constantly having to battle my internalized negative thinking that I know feeds into my low self confidence. I know that this issue is common among those with disabilities, and at almost 24 years old, I am still fighting that fight; it makes me angry because at times it seems that no matter how much I know I’ve grown and how much I’ve accomplished in life, I still don’t feel good about myself. I have to say that the most aggravating part is knowing that those days of a childhood full of criticism are long gone, but still having to deal with a sometimes defensive and bitter mindset. I don’t mind sharing that side of myself with readers because it is honest; you grow and learn as life continues , but some days wi

ll be difficult and I want to let others know it is okay to have a “down day” ; it doesn’t make you crazy, it just makes you human and there is a way to get a handle on things so life can be better. How do you that?

 I can tell you that it’s one of the hardest hurdles to jump over. When I’m having one of my harder days, I try to take some alone time and do something that I enjoy. For instance, if my legs are aching then a nice, hot bubble bath feels wonderful and those also are used to calm me down; there’s nothing more relaxing than a bubble bath! (I also enjoy writing, reading, or watching one of my favorite movies). I love being outside too; being in a quiet area presents an ideal opportunity to clear your head and refresh your thoughts back to a positive space. I have even found a good healthy cry to be beneficial. Don’t keep feelings bottled up! 

 The second aspect of myself that makes me the most angry is my tendency to beat myself up over past mistakes and decisions that were not the brightest; I am a person who feels theneedfor explanations and I try to find one for everything that I do. However, I have found that some of those mistakes just don’t have a sensible reason for happening; humans are capable of doing the most stupid things; but it doesn’t change the fact that the most nonsensical things cause the most pain in our hearts. I’ve come a long way in my personal growth due to the missteps I’ve taken. I think so often people with disabilities get stuck in their thoughts and just focus on trying to feel better in the moment no matter the cost; I know that I have not always thought things through and I’ve had very selfish moments. I regret that at a younger age, I did not realize how much I’m capable of giving to others just by being myself. The best advice I can offer is to learn to simply draw positives from the negative things you encounter in life; you may not be able to change the results of your some of your past, but you can always let yourself gain something from the experiences instead of letting them hold you back. Make everything in your life as positive as possible. I am looking forward to sharing my life with clients and being a mentor; being able to do something of that nature makes me life feel even more purposeful. Staying positive as much as you can makes life more exciting and enjoyable! I am certain that I would not be the person I am today had it not been for those “oops” moments. 

 Lastly, the  other aspects of myself that make me angry are the fact that I have never been very vocal about my feelings to my family and also the fact that I tend to let myself stay in my emotions for too long; I end up forgetting to be thankful that I have an otherwise great and healthy life and at times I feel I’m not very appreciative. I get stuck in my own little world and I forget who I’ve grown up to be. I’m no queen of anything, but I never imagined that I would live a life that is so very blessed. I am the worst at asking others for help when I need it; other than not driving, I am a very independent young woman. I clean, cook, and I help with expenses of the household (food, water, electric and my cell phone). I have found that guidance is necessary when you are traveling down this road; as much as I love and cherish my family, I know that they aren’t going to understand absolutely everything about dealing with a disability; that’s why I feel so happy and excited to be working towards being a mentor to others who are facing a similar battle; I’m here to let them know that it is possible to turn the big setbacks into small little victories one day at a time. I am hoping that maybe one day I could be an actual counselor. I am proud to be doing something good with all that life has taught me and  I truly want to be a help to others;  I want to show those with disabilities that the tough times don’t last and that one can become a person who can make a difference; all it takes is learning to deal with how you feel.