Accepting A New Normal

I personally cannot speak for the parent of a child with a disability because I'm not a parent. However, my relationship with my mother and our experiences have allowed me to see just how hard it is to accept that a child is different; instilling hope in them is all about learning to accept "a new normal". There is a solution to every obstacle.

You have to develop a sort of "action plan" for their life and try to make it as normal as possible; don't let them think that a great life isn't possible. Every disability is different, so even though the course of action you may take isn't quite the same as someone else, the main goal is the same: help them to get to where they can grow into a successful, functioning member of society. How do you do that?

Well, my action plan involved my mother teaching me to be a driven individual; she never held me back from anything I wanted to try, no matter how ridiculous it might have seemed. When I was in seventh grade, I had decided to try out for basketball; if my mom thought it was stupid, she never let on, but instead happily took me for the physical I needed and cheered me on during the tryouts. (Of course, I didn't make the team, but that's beside the point; she never let me stop dreaming.) I found a few other activities in school that were non physical that I enjoyed taking part in such as choir and theater; there are plenty of options out there. 

My mom has always told me that having to accept the fact that I was different from my siblings was one of the most painful things. I remember going from doctor to doctor as a child and my mother hoping that what was wrong could simply be "fixed". No one wants to accept that their child has a disability; I feel that is one reason why my mother insisted on me going to college; it was a way to make me seem normal that actually turned out to be one of the best times of my life because I gained a bit of structure in my life and met some of the most wonderful people. I don't think I would be where I am today had I not furthered my education; after all, it was during an English class my first year of college that my writing talent was discovered. 

The single most important thing a person with a disability needs is emotional support. As hard as this is to deal with for the parent, it is just as difficult if not more so for the child; until he or she is old enough to come to their own defense, they will need an advocate and a protector. My mom has watched me get my feelings hurt, has dried my tears, has provided love while also stepping in to help me deal with tough situations if it was necessary. I am so thankful for the relationship we've had through the years and I thank her for her input in this post. I'm living proof that a successful "new normal" is possible.