Taking A Short Break...

I am writing about change today; it is something we all encounter and along with it can come some of life’s most awesome blessings. I will be taking a break from “Molly’s Zone” until the first week of March, as my mother and I are in the process of moving and I am in charge of the not so fun task of packing. We have been so blessed and I am more than excited about making new memories and I can’t wait to enjoy having a piece of the “country farm” experience back in my life. I lived on a huge farm as a child and it is something that I have dearly missed. Even though it is no forty seven acres worth of land and I’m not nine years old anymore, I feel as though I’m getting a piece of myself rightfully restored; one that has been missing for some time and I couldn’t be happier. I have always been a country girl at heart! The past several months have been wonderful and I am so thankful for all that God has blessed me with; He has gotten me through so many rough times; He helped me to find my purpose for being and has given me so much peace; He understands me better than anyone. God is my most faithful friend, and the fact that He has blessed me with this new beginning shows that even though I have dealt with so much hurt in my heart, He not only saw me through it but has also been watching out for Mom and I all along ; He sees what we so often don’t see. I am thankful that it is not so much land this time around, and that I am older. I will have so much fun setting up a new home and decorating it! I want to end this post by saying thank you to all of my readers for following my updates and let you know that I appreciate your support and encouragement; it means the world to me. I love my job and I love working to inspire others. Goodbye for now!

Characteristics of Success

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Molly Spence

Last week, I played the role of advocate by discussing the quality of education that students with disabilities receive; I wanted this week to vary a little bit by writing a post that shares personal insight into a how a child’s upbringing can influence their child’s educational experience as a whole. Today, I’m going to discuss three characteristics that I have developed through the years; ones that are of vital importance in regards to the development of self sufficiency: positivity, a spirit of determination, and a good, solid work ethic.

The influences and the education a child receives not only comes from the teachers and the technology that is available in today’s society, but it is also one of the many responsibilities a parent has; I am not a parent, but I have been fortunate to have a mother who has influenced me in such a positive way by helping me to become the strong willed and mostly independent person I’ve become.

My mother has always shown me how to have a positive outlook on life in the face of adversity. I have faced many trials and tribulations with her by my side. I grew up not having the best of childhoods, but we’ve always had happy moments and she’s always been an example of strength for me. I’ve always looked up to her. I’ve always loved school and she encouraged me to challenge myself as much as I could because she knew of my potential. I don’t come from a family of quitters. Why should having cerebral palsy stop me from accomplishing anything and everything I could dream of? I’ve learned to never give up. Kids need parents that don’t enable them to settle for less than they are capable of; in other words, don’t baby them. Help your child to set realistic, attainable goals. Let’s face it, I’m never going to be a performer on Broadway, but my life has worked out pretty well because I was taught to always keep going in life. Without my mother, there’s so much I would have missed out on. You’ve got to teach your child to look at all possibilities and to accept themselves. The main goal that you would want to achieve is probably for them to say, “I can get through anything life throws at me”, and time helps to achieve that.

Secondly, a spirit of determination is another essential characteristic that must be developed in childhood. A disability is a huge challenge and can be much harder to deal with without a bit of tough skin. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that life doesn’t really get easier, your childhood problems simply morph into adult problems. I am for the most part an emotional person; life isn’t all rainbows and sunshine; however, I have always been a very strong willed girl; I proudly inherited that from my mother. Emotions are perfectly healthy every now and then, just don’t let it overpower you. I’m a self admitted work in progress on that; I’m getting there! Struggles usually work to make you appreciate the little things more.

Lastly, a strong work ethic is another attribute of mine that I come by honestly; both my parents are naturally hard working people; however, it is also an influenced trait. I learned from watching my mother go to work with high fevers and being extremely sick. She has never stopped no matter what she’s gone through; I find that so admirable. I feel that having a disability causes me to work harder than others, simply because of the fact that growing up I always felt I possessed a disadvantage; not so much these days, but I still love to work hard, and I enjoy what I do. I’m proud and I’m so thankful to have my mother who has always pushed me to achieve greatness. The best way to influence the development of these attributes in a child with a disability is to be an example of those very things for them; if you do so, there’s no telling how happy, well adjusted and grateful they will be.

Advocating For A Change

As I have previously written about, children with disabilities will encounter many challenges throughout their lives. For the past few months, I have shared some of my most personal experiences that life has thrown my way. Today, I wanted to take on the role of advocate by voicing my opinion on what more I think could be done in schools for young children with disabilities who have been placed in special education. I have decided to change the format of my post for this week and write my responses using question and answer style. I truly hope that my voice is heard and that the post serves to educate others.

Question #1: How difficult was it for me to get materials around school?

Answer: Well, the response to this is quite short, but also very funny; I laugh now as I think about it. Cerebral palsy made it particularly hard for me to deal with lining up certain things, especially numbers; I could not for the life of me line up the numbers on a combination lock. My first encounter with this was during my sixth grade year; having a locker was a nightmare and I don’t miss it! I distinctly remember having to carry all of my books around to every single class for the first half of the year; my arms were always so tired at the end of the school day. My 7th grade year was a different story, although equally comical. My disability has also made it hard for me to stack things in proper sequence. For example, I tend to stack big items on top of small items, instead of the usual small items on top of big; this created a mess for me daily; I was always either getting hit in the face or on my toes, depending on which way my books fell when I opened my locker. I became very close with the school janitors as well, because my locker seemed to always be jammed! The sequence stacking issue has gotten better over time, but I still catch myself and have to correct it; you have to learn to have patience and take one day at a time!

Question #2: What could schools do to support students more from a technological stance?

Answer: The amount of technology that is available to students nowadays is unbelievable. My childhood was during the late nineties and early 2000s, and the digital age was just beginning to really take its place in the world. In my opinion, the use of tablets and smartphones in the education field has caused more harm to students than good. The kind of support that kids need, especially ones who require a little more help need more than what technology can provide.

Questions 3 & 4: What could schools do to support students more emotionally and socially? Did you have any special education services?

Answer: I would like to continue my response from question two; as I’ve said, I understand that we are in the midst of an ever changing technological age, but to some extent I feel as though children do not learn as well without more one on one attention provided; that is the main thing I feel that educators and those alike should focus on . One on one time is key to present and future success. Society is quick to label kids who are different and I think we all as people should work on helping those who truly need the help to see that they are smart and that they are able to accomplish so much more than what they perceive. I feel as though teachers should strive to challenge their students more. I consider myself to have grown up in a different era so to speak; I had great teachers in middle school and high school who believed in my potential and constantly worked with me on my math skills. By my senior year, I had been enrolled in regular classes for four years and took three separate math courses, an AP Psych course, and my third year of Spanish during that last year of high school; no one could have guessed that I had been placed in special education in the first grade. I had caught up with the rest of my class; it was quite liberating! The biggest misconception in the world is that kids with disabilities don’t have the ability to learn and that they are just dumb; that couldn’t be further from the truth. In all reality, those kids are some of the brightest and most talented souls. The world just needs to learn to see that; kids need a chance to believe in themselves. As evidenced throughout my life, it is amazing how far a person can go once they truly realize their potential. I have grown so much from the little, shy five year old. My hope is that my voice is heard so that others like me can live in a world that is more positive for them; encouragement, the spirit of determination, and a good work ethic isn’t something technology can give you; it only comes from the people who are around you.

My New Years Resolution (2016)

2015 was a year full of unexpected blessings and a lot of happiness. I overcame the worst of my obstacles and I gained a sense of self that I had never had before and life has become a truly pleasant experience. My biggest hope for 2016 is that it is an even better year and that I continue on my journey of growing into a woman of courage, strength and wisdom. I find it hard to believe that I will be celebrating my 24th birthday this coming April. Where do the years go?

As much as I’ve gone through, I feel that I’ve learned something worth remembering and passing on and that is the fact that life is full of lessons and that no one knows everything there is to know, and that there is always room for improvement. I’d like to start off the new year by sharing some of the areas I want to improve in and what I hope to accomplish.

My biggest hope is to continue to look forward and be happy about what God has planned for me. 2015 was incredible and I’ve enjoyed staying so busy. I have always been a stubborn and strong willed person, but I now know just how much God really is in control; He knows what’s best for me. As I’ve said before, I never could have imagined having a career as a writer, but I am really enjoying myself. I’m excited for my success to continue throughout 2016, and I plan on continuing to work as hard as I possibly can.

A few of my other hopes and goals for the new year include continuing to blossom in the respect of accepting myself so that I can share my wisdom and empower others with disabilities. I know I will never have the highest level of confidence and that I will always be a “work in progress”. My biggest fault is that I tend to dwell on my past and things about my life that I wish I could change. I have always felt that I’m a perfectionist because of my disability. My first piece of advice for the year is that you will never grow into the person God intends for you to be without those imperfections and experiences to learn from. Imperfections are a normal part of human nature. I hope that I can truly influence others in 2016. I don’t want to solely focus on success, but also the message that I’m conveying and the impact that I leave on my readers and the people who love and know me best. I’ve learned that the way I conduct myself leaves a lasting impression and I want to focus on being positive, looking ahead and venturing into the next chapters of my life. I have come a very long way in this journey, but I know for sure that I haven’t made it to where I’m supposed to be just yet, and I’m finally okay with that.